I’m Not Happy With You

How do I word this without sounding insensitive? I’ve been holding on to this feeling for some time, and realize now there is nothing I can do to change it. To change the feeling of abandonment, the feeling of being let down. I can’t change that feeling. It’s an emotion that stems from being unwillingly stranded.

I know that I’m not ignored, at least not completely. One cannot ignore incessant reminders of what was, and what is being done in the aftermath. But I am being ghosted by you, and it is hurtful. It does no good to call you out by name, you know who you are. I just wanted to let you know that we are feeling let down by what is not being said, what is not being done, from those we thought cared. Actually cared.

Remember, it wasn’t me with flimsy excuses, it wasn’t me who hung up. It was you. Do you remember? Wasn’t that long ago.

What I used to think, how I thought about you, has changed. Not by my actions, rather by your inaction. And I just don’t understand.

Maybe that’s why I feel the way I do. I do not understand, or at least fully. Will I ever fully understand? Probably not. But maybe someday I can somehow grasp a shred of what you are going through. Maybe that would help to explain the lack of deep sensitivity on your part. A level of sensitivity one would assume to come naturally from humankind. I am not you, and you are not me. Internalize that, please.

Don’t read into this as if it were personal letter, that would be egotistically presumptuous on your part. Only you will know its application, if any. Those that know, know. Simply know that I am not happy with you, at least for now. Hard to think she could be happy with you right now either. It will be some time before I might possibly reconcile the opposite of that sentiment from within.

Just know, it still hurts, and your actions do nothing to alleviate that pain. This is all I can do. Now, the ball is in your court.